Alfred Hitchcock was once stopped at the French border by a suspicious customs official. Eyeing the space where Hitchcock listed his profession as "producer," the official demanded, "And what do you produce?" "Gooseflesh," Hitchcock coolly replied.


Janet Leigh: 'Hitch relished scaring me. When we were making Psycho, he experimented with the mother's corpse, using me as his gauge. I would return from lunch, open the door to the dressing room and propped in my chair would be this hideous monstrosity. The horror in my scream, registered on his Richter scale, decided which dummy he'd use as the Madame.'



This past Saturday, TCM (Turner Classic Movies) showed a full day of movies directed by Alfred Hitchcock. Here are a few quotes by the master of suspense...who, by the way, had a great wit.



I`m frightened of eggs, worse than frightened, they revolt me. That white round thing without any holes ... have you ever seen anything more revolting than an egg yolk breaking and spilling its yellow liquid? Blood is jolly, red. But egg yolk is yellow, revolting. I've never tasted it.


I was an uncommonly unattractive young man.


Seeing a murder on television can help work off one's antagonisms. And if you haven't any antagonisms, the commercials will give you some.


I am a typed director. If I made Cinderella, the audience would immediately be looking for a body in the coach.


Some of our most exquisite murders have been domestic, performed with tenderness in simple, homey places like the kitchen table.


When an actor comes to me and wants to discuss his character, I say, 'It's in the script.' If he says, 'But what's my motivation?, ' I say, 'Your salary.'


Television has done much for psychiatry by spreading information about it, as well as contributing to the need for it.


Always make the audience suffer as much as possible.


One must never set up a murder. They must happen unexpectedly, as in life.


Blondes make the best victims. They're like virgin snow that shows up the bloody footprints.


There is nothing quite so good as burial at sea. It is simple, tidy and not very incriminating.


Drama is life with the dull bits cut out.


Stay out of jail.


Self-plagiarism is style.


Someone once told me that every minute a murder occurs, so I don't want to waste your time, I know you want to go back to work.


There is nothing to winning, really. That is, if you happen to be blessed with a keen eye, an agile mind and no scruples whatsoever.


Actors are cattle.


I never said all actors are cattle; what I said was all actors should be treated like cattle.


There is a dreadful story that I hate actors. Imagine anyone hating Jimmy Stewart. I can`t imagine how such a rumor began. Of course it may possibly be because I was once quoted as saying that actors are cattle. My actor friends know I would never be capable of such a thoughtless, rude and unfeeling remark, that I would never call them cattle. What I probably said was that actors should be treated like cattle.


Disney has the best casting. If he doesn't like an actor he just tears him up.


[on his cameos] One of the earliest of these was in The Lodger (1927), the story of Jack the Ripper. My appearance called for me to walk up the stairs of the rooming house. Since my walk-ons in subsequent pictures would be equally strenuous - boarding buses, playing chess, etc. - I asked for a stunt man. Casting, with an unusual lack of perception, hired this fat man!


I made a remark a long time ago. I said I was very pleased that television was now showing murder stories, because it`s bringing murder back into its rightful setting - in the home.


[regarding The Birds (1963)] You know, I've often wondered what the Audubon Society`s attitude might be to this picture.


[on North by Northwest (1959)] Our original title, you know, was `The Man in Lincoln`s Nose`. Couldn't use it, though. They also wouldn't let us shoot people on Mount Rushmore. Can`t deface a national monument. And it`s a pity, too, because I had a wonderful shot in mind of Cary Grant hiding in Lincoln`s nose and having a sneezing fit.


[On directing Charles Laughton] You can`t direct a Laughton picture. The best you can hope for is to referee.


[Part of publicity campaign prior to release of Psycho (1960)] It has been rumored that "Psycho" is so terrifying that it will scare some people speechless. Some of my men hopefully sent their wives to a screening. The women emerged badly shaken but still vigorously vocal.


(When talking to a fan's mother who was complaining that her daughter would no longer go in the shower after watching Psycho )
'Then madam, I suggest you dry-clean her.'


Television is like the invention of indoor plumbing. It didn't change people's habits. It just kept them inside the house.


Man does not live by murder alone. He needs affection, approval, encouragement and, occasionally, a hearty meal.


These are bagpipes. I understand the inventor of the bagpipes was inspired when he saw a man carrying an indignant, asthmatic pig under his arm. Unfortunately, the man-made sound never equaled the purity of the sound achieved by the pig.